"Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you...I had no control over”...
I am going to open up about a problem I've had for years and hopefully talking through it will help break the cycle... I seem to always fall for the same type of girl and it always ends the same way... So, if you have a type...is it possible to fall for someone who is outside of that type?
Let's start with why don’t nice guys finish last? Simple, they do not trigger a fix that your body needs. They do behave in a way which comes across as taboo to you. Your body, over the years has now become conditioned to want to experience something particular when it comes to a future mate.
First, examine your dating history... Who have you dated? What were they like? How did it end? Think about it...When you meet "that girl", deep down...you know you shouldn’t go out with her but she sparks a chemical reaction that your body likes. It’s a like a drug. In the same way that people can become addicted to pain killers, you’re now addicted to this chemical reaction. It’s pure biology....
OVERWRITING A BAD CHEMICAL ROMANCE
1. Recognition is the First Step
Once you’ve recognised what is going on....you can break the pattern sooner. If you stop it in time...then you’re in a better position to start thinking more consciously. You will be able to bring a little bit of logic into the equation. Is she what I want...or what I need? You don't always get what you want...but you should get what you need... What she wants from a relationship has to correlate with your requirements... Otherwise you grow apart instead of together!
2. Break the Habit
My grandfather told me it takes 2 weeks to create a habit...So, if you keep on saying to yourself and everyone around you, that you always fall for the wrong type of person, you’re also programming yourself to continue the same behavior. Once a program is written, it’s difficult to rewrite so it’s best to overwrite. Instead of saying “I’ll never meet miss right” think "not every frog was meant to be a prince"... You have to dig through the ruff...to get to the diamond.. She is out there and when the time is right...Love will find you!
3. Know What You Need
Ask yourself, “up until now, what’s the void I’ve been trying to fill?” What is it exactly that you’ve been getting from the "same type" you've dated over the years? What have they been giving you that you’ve needed? Each of these women has served their purpose in some way for you. What need within you have they fulfilled? This question has to be answered to break the cycle... It is hard to nail down...what you are really looking for in a person and what you've gotten out of broken relationships... So, once this is figured out...then you can get what you need from a person who is capable of giving it to you!
4. Equally Yoked
Its true, opposites do attract but sometimes like stay together... My grandmother was right when she told me that you and the person you love should be equally yoked...meaning you should have a similar moral code... Because if not...those differences become reasons to break-up instead of factors that keep you together... Sometimes the thing that draws you to a person...can end up being the very thing that comes between you.... So, if your type is not equally yoked...then you are probably wasting precious time....and the love will end way too soon...
