1. If you move and the relationship doesn’t work out, are you going to resent your partner?
If that risk seems too great for you — if the idea of making such a big sacrifice without experiencing the payoff you’re hoping for leaves you feeling bitter and regretful — you probably aren’t quite ready to make that leap.
2. Have you discussed a long-term future together?
You need to discuss a long-term, serious commitment together, uprooting your life and moving to a new city is probably premature. You both need to imagine a life together at least five years in the future and not be freaked out by that idea before you start packing your bags.
3. Is the new city one you can picture yourself being happy in?
Is it a gay friendly city? First, you need to accept that love doesn’t conquer all. There’s a good chance you’re going to be miserable there, if you move in too quickly. If you aren’t sure how you feel, spend your vacation time — a week or two if you’ve got it — “playing house” at your significant other’s place and trying to imagine how you’d feel if you never left.
4. Do you have a back-up plan?
What happens if you make the move and things, for whatever reason, don’t work out? You can’t possibly anticipate every issue that might arise, nor should you be able to answer all these questions exactly, but you should have some idea what your back-up plan would be if you realize the move was a mistake.
5. Do you have job prospects in the new city?
Anyone who has ever been unemployed for very long can attest to how depressing it is to be out of work. Add to that the isolation you will likely feel being in a new town where maybe you don’t know many people other than your significant other, and it can be super damn lonely. Make sure you have a job once you move in case it does not work out so you will be financially able to move out on if necessary.
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